Wishes of Death
by GoneDrake
Summary: Tasashi Aukina completed the first parts of the Chunin exams, and is ready for the preliminaries. But as she begins to fight, her anger is revoked, and old tendancies return. With Gaara's help, will she be able to hold onto the last shreds of her sanity?


"Aukina, where are you?"

I froze, my heart missing a beat. His footsteps echoed throughout the empty corridor, whispers coming from the shadows. They were taken in soft little strides, sounds that sent shivers rattling down my spine. The careful placement of his feet was a sign of how intent he was… on finding me.

Possibilities.

So many ways to torture my soul.

The taps continued, coming closer every second. By the noise of his shoes, my ears hearing every crunch of them against the wooden beams, I could tell that he had only meters to go. One more turn of a corner, and he'd be upon me, eyes sparkling with a horrible craze. Just one more second…

"Gotcha."

I tried to scream, but nothing would come out.

Thump thump.

My heart beat loudly in my chest, a mixture of relief, worry, and anticipation setting my mind on the edge. I gripped the headband tightly in my fist, listening as the others expressed their overdue opinions. They muttered away, lost in a whirlwind of thoughts; while I said nothing. There was no point in making more noise.

I scanned the crowd with dark eyes, taking a sharp breath as I spotted a certain group of people. Shino's team stepped into the center of the remaining genin, and I couldn't help myself from staring. It had been made clear that there were a group to fear.

"Don't worry," Gaara muttered, words close to inaudible. He squeezed my hand gently, but I could feel the tenseness in his palm. "Don't pay them any attention. You're better than everyone here."

I gave a flick of a nod, blushing as he sensed my troubles. The boy had a way of knowing exactly how I felt; something that was impossible to prevent. Lying was never an option, for he'd always see the truth. His abilities were comforting, to some extent, but also pretty unnerving. I couldn't even hide in my own skin.

Digging my fingernails into the flesh of my palm, I focused on what the third Hokage was telling us.

"…to promote friendship among allied nations and raise the level and standards in the art of shinobi… Be very clear about what these fine-sounding phrases actually mean! The series of so-called examinations is, in fact…" He sighed, taking a long look around the crowded arena, "…a war-in-miniature between all of our allied lands. We must all…"

I had nearly drifted off, thoughts lulling me to sleep, when a different voice shook me awake. I blinked my eyes as another man entered the group, wearing a vest and black pants. His face was pale and sickly, complexion hollow, looking as though he hasn't slept in days. His shaky tone informed us of how unstable he truly was, and I winced as his introduction was interrupted by a number of gut-wrenching coughs.

"I must ask you to do something for me…" Master Hayate continued, voice barely above a whisper. A harsh giggle escaped my lips, but a sharp glance from Gaara shoved me back into silence. "Ummm… you see… there are some preliminaries to the exam proper… and whether you proceed to the main exam is contingent on how well you manage those."

A few of the ninjas shot out replies, so his weary explanations continued.

"Well… I don't want to say that the first two exams weren't demanding enough… But the truth is… we still have too many applicants. Under the traditional rules of the exam, we have to have a preliminary test… to reduce the number of applicants who'll proceed to the third exam."

I heard Gaara chuckle, and felt thankful for his self confidence. Without his assurances of how we'd get through life, I was certain that I would have given up by now. No, I wasn't a quitter, but I wasn't very sure of myself, either.

"So not everyone will make it to the third part of the Chunin exams?" A pink haired girl questioned, forehead creasing in worry. She fiddled with the bottom of her blouse, frowning as the boy in front of her winced in pain. Uchiha Sasuke, the darkened kid, was struggling to keep his composure. Shooting his a tear-ridden glance, she asked, "What if all of us don't make it?"

Hayate coughed loudly. "There are still too many of you to qualify for the exam." He gave us all sympathetic smiles, making my skin writhe. "But to have gotten this far… I'm sure your masters are extremely proud of you. Just do your best, and never, ever give up."

The instructor crossed his arms, looking fierce, then erupted into another coughing fit.

As I turned my head to the left, it became apparent that the girl hadn't even been listening. Her attention was set strong on Sasuke. They were mid-conversation, gripping each other's hands. The boy was stiff with pain, but somehow Sakura seemed even more tormented.

Sasuke pressed his hand to his neck, so I wasn't able to catch a glimpse of what was hidden, the origin of his misery. But it did seem to be getting worse, and the girl had begun to cry.

I snickered, a grin tugging at the corners of my lips. Their pathetic little moment was just so amusing, and the expressions plastered across their faces were priceless. How stupid they truly were, to be worrying about each other. I was enjoying the scene so much that I barely noticed Gaara pulling me towards him.

"Shh, Aukina!" He pressed his lips against my ear, whispers muffled. "Now is not the time. Save your sadism for the exams."

I glared at him. "It's not my fault. You know I can't help it."

"I know," Gaara's expression grew warm, but only for an instant. The protective mask was back a second later, eyes hard, features impassive. "I know. Just try not to draw any attention to youself. The teachers have a," He scoffed, "sore spot for malisciousness."


End file.
